Last week I decided to become a different person. I went to the hairdresser's and got myself short hair again (it looks awesome, if I may say so myself :)), I wore bright red lipstick to work, I actually talked to my crush (unsuccessfully, he still doesn't care about me). I tried to feel better, but I wasn't very successful. My crush didn't notice my hairstyle, I'm still socially awkward, and I'm in a constant state of panic because my computer has crushed down and I can't finish my overdue work, my best friend has met ANOTHER guy she's very happy with and my skin gets worse and worse although I eat quite healthy and try to avoid chocolate. I'm sick of feeling angsty and nervous and uncomfortable in my own body. I'm sick of all the small catastrophes that happen to me ecery other day and I'm sick of not being able to tell anyone. I feel bad because I'm jealous of my friends happiness because of her new boyfriend. How can I be such a lousy friend?